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Thread: Someone Needs To Amuse Me Or I Will Defensively Bake A Cake.

  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Adam View Post
    That's one big-ass Dutch oven.
    We call it 'Camp Fire Goulash' when we do it all at once. You get points for Eagle Scout if you forge it personally.

    "Alexa, slaughter the fatted calf."

  2. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by scott View Post
    How do you make bread without eggs?

    We've been out here all week.
    My entire life has been preparation for this exact question. Now I can die having fulfilled my purpose on Earth.

    Key Steps for No-Knead Bread

    Make a wet shaggy dough. This bread can be mixed entirely by hand — just don’t expect a bouncy ball of bread dough. Instead this wet dough and the long rise combine to develop proteins and gluten without kneading. The dough will be sticky, rough, and bit shaggy, so don’t fret!

    Give it a long rise. A long rise is required for no-knead bread (although you can try our no-knead bread in a hurry in a pinch) with most recipes calling for an overnight rise. Our recipe has a little more yeast and can be ready in as few as six hours. Make sure the dough is covered and in a relatively warm, room-temperature area. I stash mine on top of the fridge on cold winter days.

    Shape on parchment paper into a tight ball. Shaping the dough into a round loaf on a pice of parchment paper makes it easier to load and unload the bread from the oven. You want to make sure you shape the loaf into a relatively tight round in order to get a high rise.

    Bake in a Dutch oven. You will need an oven-safe pot or Dutch oven to bake this bread. We prefer the Dutch oven because its weight holds heat well and keeps the steam created by the bread inside the pot for a crisper crust. Take a look at this post for more alternatives to Dutch ovens for the no-knead bread recipe.

    Serving and Storing No-Knead Bread
    Once out of the oven, let the bread cool for at least 10 minutes before slicing and serving. Any bread not slathered in butter and devoured immediately should be tightly wrapped and stored at room temperature where it keeps well for about three days. After that? Cut it into cubes for the best croutons of your life.

    (Image credit: Joe Lingeman)

    How To Make No-Knead Bread
    1 loaf

    1 pound all-purpose flour (about 3 cups) plus more for sprinkling
    2 teaspoons salt
    3/4 teaspoon active dry yeast
    1 1/2 cups lukewarm water

    Large bowl
    Plastic wrap or kitchen towel
    Large Dutch oven with ovensafe lid
    Parchment paper


    Make a wet, shaggy dough. Place the flour, salt, and yeast in a large bowl and whisk to combine. Make a well in the center, and add the water into the well. Stir until it forms a shaggy dough.

    Cover the dough bowl and let rise for 6 to 8 hours. Cover the bowl with plastic wrap or a kitchen towel. Set aside in a warm place to rise until doubled in size and bubbly, 6 to 8 hours.

    Shape the dough and rise for another hour. Lightly flour a piece of parchment paper. Turn the dough out onto it, folding it over on itself at least once while you do so. Quickly shape the dough into a round ball (see this video for basic instructions). Cover with a kitchen towel and let rise for 1 hour more.

    Preheat the oven and the Dutch oven. About 30 minutes before the hour is up, arrange a rack in the middle of the oven. Place a large Dutch oven with its lid on the rack. Heat the oven to 450°F.

    Transfer the loaf to the preheated Dutch oven.The shaped dough will have risen and nearly doubled in size. Using the parchment paper as a sling, carefully transfer the loaf, still on the paper, to the Dutch oven. If desired, make a slash or shallow cut on the top of the dough with kitchen shears or a sharp knife so that the bread can expand while baking.

    Cover and bake for 30 minutes. Place the lid on the pot and put it in the oven. (Careful, the lid is hot!) Bake covered for 30 minutes.

    Uncover and bake for 15 minutes more. Remove the lid and bake for 15 minutes more. You can be extra-sure that the bread is done when an instant-read thermometer inserted in the top or side registers 210°F.

    Cool and slice the bread. Remove the Dutch oven from the oven and use the parchment paper to transfer the bread to a wire rack. Let cool at least 15 minutes before slicing the bread.
    You can use any flour or combination of flours but you won't get the dramatic oven spring with all rye or 100% whole wheat.

    You can fake the parchment paper with foil or just spray or oil the loaf and drop it in the pot.

    I've left it in the fridge for a week at a shot before baking - it will be fine.

    You can bake it at any temp between 300 F and 450 F. The timing will change is all.

    I wouldn't add a bunch stuff like cheese or seeds to this. It's too difficult to tweak the rise with a lot of random stuff in there.

    You can roll it out and shape it for a conventional loaf pan if you want but why bother?

    It freezes okay and will last longer than 3 days depending on how hot or cootie-filled your home is.

    If push comes to shove, you can do this over a campfire or on a grill.

    The Kitchn
    "Alexa, slaughter the fatted calf."

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  4. #23
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    Wednesday, October 2nd, 2013
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    I love cakes, but here's a goat jumping on a trampoline.

    Last edited by Gingersnap; Sunday, March 22nd, 2020 at 11:03 AM.

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  6. #24
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    Tuesday, October 1st, 2013
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    I have no particular place to go to do anything but the very idea that I can't is driving me insane. I have a sudden need to learn to tango or join a quilting class. I am forbidden from making cakes.

    This just at the time when I had an idea for a coconut cake with a new twist on crème anglaise and one of those molds from Nordic Ware.

    There is still no church tomorrow although there will be an online version. I can't have breakfast anywhere after. I can't see my friends. My brother's dog still looks like a freak. The pirate cat attempted to hang himself in desperation from some miniblinds. (I rescued him but the lawyer cat is considering a suit.)

    The Collie is despondent due to not seeing his dog buddies. Mr. Snaps is snappish since he can't have his usual Cronie interactions. He's retreated deeply into Reno's ill-advised skirmish. Food and sex is all I can offer.

    Talk me off the step ladder.
    "Alexa, slaughter the fatted calf."

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